TO OUR CLOWN PRINCESS ON HER 3RD BIRTHDAY

Well, I started out to blog about Puddi, my puddacious daughter, for her upcoming third birthday. But words, my constant companions in everything I do failed me this time. I just couldn't find the right words to encapsulate what she means to me, how she lights up our lives, to describe her kooky personality and the things she does...So I decided to hand over my pen ( keyboard in this case) to my better 1/3rd, as he is far more gifted with words than I am, to tell our dear daughter how we feel about her.

All I can bring myself to say is that if I could have imagined a daughter and brought her to life, she would have been such a pale, insipid thing compared to my beautiful butterfly of a Puddi. You fill up my heart, darling. Happy birthday!

Love, Mama

Guest post by A

My dearest Puddi,

What can I say about you which words can capture adequately?

Let me try comparisons. There was Lucille Ball. There was Sridevi. And now there’s you. The same impish personality, and the same ability to make everyone laugh by doing something completely kooky, even as they’re gasping over how pretty you are. The same gift of just walking into a room and stealing a scene, simply by ensuring that no one can take their eyes off your face.

How about food metaphors? You’re like an ice-cream rolled into a lemon meringue pie, to which lots of cream has been added, with some spice on top for taste. And all that’s actually just in the first spoonful.

Hmm – let’s try just talking about life with you. I never cease to be amazed by how you can look like a tomboy in T-shirt and shorts, and transform into a little lady the moment you’re in a frock or a dress. I love how you wake up frowning with your wild hair all mussed, and then suddenly make the morning good by switching on that dazzling smile. Your thirst for adventure and desire for new experiences (inherited in spades from your mom) lift my spirits and remind me just how full of possibilities life can be. It’s a joy to watch you playing with your two brothers - I hope they’ll always appreciate what a loving, fun sister they have. It breaks my heart to see your small face crumple and tears roll down your soft cheeks if your mom or I scold you – it feels as if we’ve violated a sacred vow. I can’t bear the thought of anything so much as scratching you (that’s my alibi for being the exceptionally protective father that you’ll soon discover I am – your boyfriends better watch out!).

Nah. You know what, there’s no point in trying to describe you – it’s like chasing a rainbow with a butterfly net.

So let me just say that you’re a big chunk of my heart, that I didn’t know what having a daughter would change my life in so many ways, and that I already choke up when I think of you going away one day.

So have a very happy birthday sweetheart, and here’s hoping each of your birthdays celebrates a year which was better than the last.

You make us feel truly blessed. Thank you for being our daughter.


With all my love
Abba

Puddi turns two

I can't believe two years have flown by so fast. We waited for her for longer than planned - I had wanted to be pregnant with second baby by the time Chubbocks turned one, but the craving for sleep proved more overpowering than any such wishes. I still remember how it was I found out I was expecting. We had been trying but been disappointed month after month when I turned out not to have conceived, through the trying was fun ;).

Then one morning as I was washing my face, I suddenly realised my skin was glowing and my hair was shining more than usual. I thought it may be a sign but after so many disappointments did not want to get my hopes up so tamped down my excitement. A couple of days later, I was wandering around Khan Market when I was hit by an attack of hunger so strong I thought my knees would buckle. I barely made it to the McD's and wolfed down two McAloo Tikki burgers and a chocolate milk shake in record time before I could summon the energy to stand up again. I bought two testing kits immediately. A was in Bombay but I couldn't stand to wait and did the test the next morning and called him, at a peak of excitement. He was just boarding the flight to get back and I don't know how the two of us managed to concentrate on any work the rest of the day.

I desperately wanted a girl - I had wanted one even the first time, even though I just knew from day one that Chubbocks would be a boy, and had been bitterly disappointed to start with. So this time, though instinct told me it would be a girl, I didn't know if it was wishful thinking or a real instinct. Anyway, we went hunting for baby names, as the one we had picked out years before now didn't appeal as much, and guess what? All the names we liked were girl names. It was only literally 2 days before she was born that we panicked and finally agreed on a boy name. Luckily we didn't need to use it because in the last ultrasound the doc told us it was a girl - and he also told us that the baby had a nice sharp nose that could be seen from in there, which had both A and me terrified that she would inherit his somewhat large nose.

Well, she didn't and she won't have his nose. Or his good temperament. The worst parts of Puddi are all me - the bossy attitude ( whenever Chubbocks is trying to keep her safe, e.g. when she's reaching for an electrical socket, and shouting to her not to touch it, she turns around and withers him with a frigid glare, "Chubbocks, do'n schout!" She seems to have a mind of her own, already lisping defiance at me, "Kaloonga!" when I forbid her from doing something. Far from being docile or quiet, this mad thing loves to run amock around the house, rarely sitting down for more than a few minutes, jumping from sofas, climbing on the chairs, sitting down inside flower pots and in general endangering life and limb at a constant speed.
Independent-minded, she insists on feeding herself, making a giant mess but also managing to stowe away a fair amount of food inside herself. She's pretty brave too - she started out with a fear of the swimming pool in Goa but by the end of the week was happily playing ring-a-ring-of-roses with us in the deep part.
She's quite the chatterbox, like her brother, and easily able to communicate whatever she wants to. She's Chubbock's shadow, asking for him if he's away even for a minute, running along behind him as valiantly as she can on her toddler-ey little legs. And the clown of the house who loves playing tricks, the sly little thing who turns her back to me and pretends to cry, fooling me quite often!

For the livewire that she is, her quiet moments are all the sweeter. The times when she cuddles up in my lap, facing me, legs astraddle, and looks up intently into my eyes, connecting at a soul-deep level. The times when she flips through her favourite animal or Krishna/ Ganesha books. The wide-eyed way she watches TV when 'Kinna' ( Krishna) comes on cartoon network. The way she becomes all still and moony when she's sleepy and gazes unblinkingly into the distance.
I can't believe that two years back she was not here and that this huge Puddi-shaped space that has appeared in our home and our hearts was still vacant. She has created such a huge space for herself - one that I wouldn't have believed possible when Chubbocks seemed to fill it all. I can't find enough time everyday to just pull her plump, soft cheeks or caress her silky skin. Or to tickle her and hear that crazy giggle. Or put some music on the laptop to watch her dance with abandon, inventing new steps for every song. Or marvel at her beautifully shaped hands and legs and how perfectly muscular they are. And gratefully observe just how well she and Chubbocks have become one unit, fighting, playing, tumbling, scribbling, but always together.
I never imagined that I would have a daughter who was sweet and docile, to tell you the truth. My family is full of strong, assertive and vociferous women so I figured that would be par for the course. And yet Puddi is all that and so much more than I could ever have imagined. I'm feeling a little sentimental about the fact that all too soon she'll stop being the baby of the house and become a big sister - she doesn't seem big enough for that. Though Chubbocks went through the same transition quite beautifully, and I'm sure he'll be a great role model for Puddi too. Something tells me Puddi and I will have our share and more of turf battles when she grows up -she's too feisty for that not to happen. But I'm looking forward even to that, as well as all the other joys and smiles that Puddi blesses us with, each and every day.

Puddi - I love you sooo much. Happy Birthday, darling!